This is a article I found in RELEVANT Magazine that has helped me. I was worried that all the negative emotions that would sometimes resurface meant that I was not forgiving my offender. I believed that because I was not ready to reconcile the relationship that meant that I had not forgiven him. This is not true. Reconciliation and forgiveness are two separate things.
If you are in the same boat, I hope that you gain a little insight from this article.